Loneliness, Cost, Clergy and Cluelessness

Is it not ironic how the most depressing day of the year, also known as Yom Kippur, happens to be the same day the majority of Jewish people attend Shul? No wonder membership in Ottawa is down. If you only attend Shul on the high holidays, one third of your experience is associated with standing for hours in silence, starvation, and uncomfortable clothing, while dreaming about your dairy laden meal after sundown.

My name is Samantha Banks and I am “guilty” of attending Shul three times a year. I did not go to Hebrew day school, I did not grow up in a Kosher home, and my grandparents were not Holocaust survivors. I attended a Jew-ish camp (aka nothing was Jewish about it except that every camper was Jewish). Despite my unobservant upbringing, my passion for the State of Israel, my contributions to our vibrant Jewish community and my desire to make a Jewish home, are undeniable.

On Sunday October 20^th, Limmud Ottawa facilitated a panel on the topic, “Why Young Jewish Adults do not go to Shul?”  
                                                                                                        
Here are four reasons why I believe young adults are straying away from traditional Shul and “Jewish” experiences:

1.   Loneliness: Quite often young adults move away from the cities they were raised in, to pursue academic and career opportunities. Without family or friends, Shul can be perceived as a daunting place to go by yourself.

2.   Cost: Without your family paying your Shul premiums and no longer qualifying for a youth membership, the cost can be a burden that a young person does not want to budget for. Vacations generally trump reserving yourself a plot near a tree.

3.   Clergy: When not attending your own Shul, you probably never had the opportunity to schmooze with the Rabbim of your new city. It is hard to relate to a sermon and the leadership of a Shul without having a relationship outside the sanctuary. 

4.   Cluelessness:  I do not know about you, but WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON UP THERE? The average Shul attendee does not read or speak Hebrew, does not understand biblical text and cannot relate to the material.

Considering all of the above, can you blame a young person for not making the effort to attend Shul?

Young adults today have very alternative lifestyles; why would they choose to go to a place that can come across as restrictive when they can bring Judaism to them? I am certainly not religious, but I do practice my own version of Jewish. Every Friday night I host or get hosted for Shabbat dinner. I rock the apron then throw on the heels!

Two Rabbis on the Limmud Ottawa panel have had tremendous success generating large numbers of young adults to their services and Shabbat dinners because their formula is grassroots and started in their homes (Glebe Shul in Ottawa and Ghetto Shul in Montreal). 

Give young adults multiple reasons to walk through your Shul’s doors and I promise that after a few social, educational, and/or swanky events, they will return for services, Shabbat dinners and the High Holidays. They will view your Shul as a social meeting ground and not just a high paying membership club. Young adults are waiting to be engaged! Just like Miley Cirus sings, “This is our house. This is our rules.”

Link to Canadian Jewish News article "Shul not a Priority for young, Jewish adults."